In this blog, Nicola Black an Engagement Manager at NECS, reflects on what it was like to care for a close relative with a learning disability, while on holiday. She shares how seeing true inclusion in action was a powerful reminder of why inclusive engagement is so important.
“Recently, my husband and I took his sister (my sister-in-law) Lorraine on her first proper family holiday in decades. The last time she had a holiday with him, she was 19. She is now 67.
“Lorraine lives in a care home in Southport, while we are based in the North East. As her named guardians and carers, we like to visit her every 6 to 8 weeks to stay involved in her life and ensure that all her needs are being met. We’d always hoped to take her away, but until now, she never felt able, past attempts were met with resistance, and some of her behaviours made it feel too difficult.
“This time, though, something shifted, and she agreed to come.
“The holiday wasn’t easy. Lorraine’s learning disability and institutional habits, such as eating too quickly, hiding things or wandering at night, meant there wasn’t much rest. I was her full-time carer throughout, and that came with challenges. But what the week lacked in relaxation, it gave back in something more meaningful: moments of real joy, inclusion and connection.
“We watched Lorraine try new things, from visiting the circus, the zoo and Madame Tussauds to dipping into a hot tub for the very first time. She ate more ice cream than we could count and soaked up every moment of seaside air and that family connection.
“We were so grateful for how kind and understanding people were along the way. From staff at attractions to people we met while out and about, there was warmth and patience rather than judgement, and that made a real difference.
“As an Engagement Manager with NECS, I’ve worked to make engagement more inclusive for people with learning disabilities, and a few years ago, I led a consultation exploring what respite care means for those who rely on it and for the families who support them. That work helped shape how we understand choice, dignity and inclusion, but living that experience firsthand with Lorraine brought it into even sharper focus.
“Seeing inclusion in action, not as a policy or a project, but as a shared experience, was incredibly powerful, reminding me that inclusive engagement must always be rooted in empathy, listening and understanding people’s real lives.
“We hope to make this an annual tradition. Because everyone deserves the chance to feel the warmth of family, the joy of new experiences, and the comfort of being included.”